And this is why I'm gone.

<3

Happy Graduation Season Everyone!! :D

Cause Formspring told me so.

Formspring can tell you a lot of things. Who's dating whom. Why they're dating. Why the last couple broke up. How much of a whore someone is. How many people so and so had sex with. What color underwear they wore last weekend. Who still has their virginity. What's so and so's fave color, song, band, boy. WHATEVERS! Pretty much anything can be found out on formspring and it is usually all useless stuff. On top of all that the questioners can be hidden. Lucky buggers.

Anyways I know this is a lame start but I was trying to get to the point and got lost somewhere. Someone asked me today on FORMSPRING when am I gonna update my blog. Hm, I thought about it and was all "I posted something like two days ago." But then was like "But it sucked, so does it really count?" "OH well" I replied to myself. Hahahahaha. I'm a lame fuck.

But anyways I just came on to let everyone know that as soon as graduation is over next Saturday my blog will be good again. I mean I've seen everyone do this I-need-a-break-to-focus-on-the-real-world-not-BloggieLand thing and I always said I wasn't gonna do this but updating a blog actually takes work. More work then I'm willing to put in right now.

So with that, please don't leave me I only have 13 (well actually 14) of you. But I promise I'll be back if you promise not to leave. I'm needy. Ahahaha!

Great, like Frosted Flakes.

Today was good, pretty damn good.

If you are not my boyfriend or you would not like to lose your dinner IGNORE THIS PART.

Happy Birthday for the 8 millionth time baby. (: You're the bestest, no seriously. I hope I made your birthday as special as I could even from 4,000 miles away. Love you the mostest best friend**. (:

Gotta make him feel special somtimes but enough with the cutesy talk.

I had this Creative Writing thing tonight. It was pretty good. We read stuff to an audience of parents and friends. Maybe I'll post mine later, maybe I won't. It was long. I'll come up with something interesting to put up. Maybe my favorite piece from the class. I don't know. I would do it now but my laptop is tweaking so I can't. /: Hopefully I can get it all fixity, fixed soon so I can post something cooler then telling you about what I'm gonna post. (Oh, I'm so lame.) Oh and I'll post some pickys cause there were some being taken. (:

On a lamer note, some lame fucks keep calling me on restricted. What a surprise? Hmmm, anyways they're being really irritating and if I ever find out who it is, beware. No seriously. You're an irritating fuck who needs to grow up!!

Sorry for all the swearage. x.x

Anyways, it's to late for me to care about my blog or my language...so NIGHT!

**Best Friend #2 I promise, Britt.

I've noticed

I write less but it kind of got better or so I think.
Any comments?
Any ways, I'm real tired and have homework to catch up on.
I'll be back soon, I promise!

So Predictable.

Every blogger around is probably gonna write something about their mom or a mom like person, why they're the best (or worst) mother on earth or a time where they had to play mommy. Blah, blah, blah. So since Mother's Day is not my favorite holiday ever (don't get me wrong I'm not trying to be disrespectful to moms, I just have a crap one) I'm not gonna do that, I'm gonna write about me cause I'm so awesome.

This weekend was a good one, I'll post pictures later. If Tiffy ever gives them to me.

But it started off hanging with my Aunty Erin (who I guess is a mother-like figure in my life). We went out to dinner at this place called Cuatro, an Asian-Latin fusion restaurant. The food was pretty good, prices not bad, service SUCKED. The appetizers are actually the bestest I've ever had, haha. We ate some Spicy Ahi chip stuff, seriously go and buy it or go die. ;P I think our bill was about $100 for two people, with tip and drinks (not mine). Our server a man whose name I'll politely leave out, was shitty. I've had better service at McDonald's. (Seriously, putting the creamer in my coffee...awesome!)
- Strike 1 for the waiter was bringing warm Champagne, I mean seriously.
- Strike 2 he served a whole table (6 people) with cold Champagne before bringing my aunty a new cold glass when she asked for it.
- Strike 3 was being just a shitty waiter in general, he was slow and cocky, and when he saw someone he knew he totally just threw (and I mean threw!) our plate onto our table. WTF?! Only for this dumb guy to find out that my Aunty works for a hotel (because a friend came up to her, and he knew she worked at a hotel.) He gave them amazing service. I watched. Once he saw her say hi to us, he came and inquired about it only to find out she worked in the hotel biz too. Which is very important in HI, like majorly important. He gave us way better service after that. KISS ASS. Ugh.

The next day was Ray Ray's birthday party at the Pukalani Community Center. It was pretty damn fun, even if it was a 5th birthday party. We set up the party, screwed around all day, helped little kids play games and ghetto busted a pinata. It was a good party minus the semi-junk weather. Happy 5th Birthday Ray Boy. (:

I'm a boring soul.

My life has been extremly boring lately.

My school day schedule looks something like this:
5:15 am - Talk to boyfriend on phone
5:30 am - Get off phone and go back to sleep
5:45 am - Start motivating myself out of bed
5:55 - 57 - Get out of bed and go brush teeth, wash face, etc.
6:10 - Eat breakfast
6:20 - Lie around on coach until forced to get into car
6:45 - Wait at bus stop
7:00 - Leave bus stop
7:30 - 40 - Arrive at school, walk with Chaysen & Britt to class or maybe get snack
7:45 - 2:30 - In school
2:45 - 3:30 - Bus ride home
3:30 - 4:30 - Drive home/run errands
4:45 - Lie on couch, watch tv, be a lazy bum, check facebook, talk on phone to boyfriend
Continue lying on couch, watching tv, being lazy, checking facebook and talking on phone, add in a shower and dinner
10ish - Sleep

Seriously, what a life. This has only started recently (well for a few weeks now) I hope that soon I'll throw this stupid lazy person schedule away and get my life back. UGH.

Oh Captain, my Captain.

Karpe Diem.
SERIOUSLY...I love that saying.

I've been working on a lot of stuff for college lately. I'm glad I've been a little productive even if I haven't been doing to much homework. I really can't wait till graduation though.

So I kind of fixed my computer, but I dunno. We'll see how long it lasts.

I wrote this in Creative Writing, it's called a Pantoum. It's called "Mistake" but that's just cause I wasn't feelin' to creative.

He made a mistake; he didn’t mean to hurt her.
He broke his own heart
What a terrible lesson to learn,
But that was just the start.

He broke his own heart
Tore it apart piece by piece
But that was just the start.
For he believed he was getting what he deserved.

Tore it apart piece by piece
He ripped his apology to shreds
For he believed he was getting what he deserved.
All good things must come to an end.

He ripped his apology to shreds
Instead he simply wrote a song.
All good things must come to an end
He said, although still clinging to belong.

Instead he simply wrote a song
What a terrible lesson to learn
He said, although still clinging to belong.
He made a mistake; he didn’t mean to hurt her.

If you figured it out pantoums repeat the same lines. Google it, it's a cool kind of poem to learn how to write, especially when it's something about a memory or the past. It kind of gives it this feeling that plays well with it. I'm not sure, maybe you feel it too.

So there is the post I promised last night. Be back soon. Shooties, bloggies. (;

Broken, broke-in.

My laptop has been broken lately and that's what I'll credit my lack of blog posts to. Also the intense amount of homework I've had that I of course waited till last minute to complete.

Blah, blah. Homework sucks, finals suck. We all know how that goes BUT seriously, only about 19 more days of school!! I'm stoked for school to end, not stoked for Project Grad but whatevers I'll live.

Well this is just about it for now, I think I'll have to put up another post later tonight for my lack of posting lately. So be lookin' out for it. Shooties for now.

So obviously

from my last post you see that I deserve the Nobel Peace Prize. Seriously, right?
Bah, whatevers. I had a bad day.

Today isn't anything special but this week feels crazy. I'm overwhelmed. To much stuff to do but to much of my best skills getting in my way. What are those you may ask?
1) Laziness
2) Superproprocrastination-ness (And that is totally a word!)
A shiz load of homework and projects and papers to be done and college stuff to prepare but so much NCIS to be watched and zzzzleeep to be had Seriously? How do my teachers expect me to do any of this while I have such a packed schedule of nothingness, I mean awesomeness.

Well I'm sure blogging isn't helping my busy situation either but there's always time for blogging. Wow, what a life I live. I can't wait to fail college. YAY me.

And I wish you all luck since you're surely in the same perdicament as me. And I'm out, night.

Go stick your head in the ground.

Seriously, I can't stand you. Don't bother me, EVER.

The end.

Act Like A Lady

Think Like A Man by Steve Harvey.It's a good book. You should check it out. Especially if you're not in a relationship yet and you're looking for one or you're in a new(ish) one. Actually I think anyone should read it but especially those people.

It talks a lot about relationships and guys secrets. Which you know any girl over the age of 15 wants to know. lol. But the 90 day rule and the 5 questions are two things I think that were the most useful things that I've read so far but I've only made it to Chapter 12.

Well go out and buy it or borrow it or whatevers.
Bye, bye Bloggies. Have a nice weekend.

I hate, hate, hate...

planning for college, and money.
They suck, suck, suck.

Yeah, I'm such a positive person I know.
Everyone hates me cause of it.

I'd like to thank the academy...

Actually I'd rather thank Safiaaa from Thinkers Reverie for giving me the Honest Scrap Award. :D


I stole this from her blog to describe it for you all:
The Honest Scrap Award is "for bloggers who put their heart on display as they write from the depths of their soul." You write 10 honest things about yourself that are not common knowledge and then you pass it on to 6 fellow bloggers that touch your heart by the honesty and sincerity they give with each post.

And lucky me got chosen. (; Safiaaa did say that I write about life in ways that she thinks anyone could relate to. I told this to le boyfriend and he says he agrees. So I'm guessing it must be true.

Speaking of true, one of the things required of me after receiving this award is to write 10 truthful things about myself that aren't common knowledge so here it goes.

1. I have issues with numbers. I hate odd numbers or numbers that aren't flat. By that I mean numbers that aren't 5, 10, 100 or stuff like that. I hate the numbers 27 and 56. My favorite number is 8.
2. I'm the messiest OCD person ever. Only certain things will "trigger" the OCD in me. Things like if my fingernails are different sizes, if my fingers aren't cracked, if the size of my writing changes on the same paper, if things aren't lined up nicely. And more.
3. I'm a mother bear. I'm nurturing when I see someone needs help but I don't like to be nurturing in my relationships with boys or close friendships.
4. I'm an off and on runner. Right now I'm off. I really like to run but it's to hard to do it up here where I live in Waihe'e. The air is so cold is burns my throat. :( I'll get it back though.
5. I'm almost anti-American food. I don't really eat much hamburgers, pizza or regular hot dogs. I do like "Hawaiian hot dogs" though, the red kine.
6. When I was little I was a vegetarian except for I would eat chicken nuggets. Which are still my favorite food till this day.
7. I like little kid stuff, like painting pictures, playing with play-doh and still watch some of the tv shows. I think this has a lot to do with babysitting so much.
8. My favorite candy is Resse's. I love chocolate. :D
9. I hate applying for scholarships and have been putting off filling out the papers and getting my recommendations for a LONG time.
10. I wanna be one of those parents that fills out that baby book almost religiously one day.

And lastly I need to nominate 6 (6? What a weird number) other bloggers to receive this award. I'm guessing that I can't give it back to the person who gave it to me which makes me sad since she would have been one of my 6. Oh I'll just have to work harder now. GREAT. (; Anyways, I would have nominated her since she writes about life really well in a way that I know many people can relate to. Her stuff is deep sometimes too. It's good so even though I'm not nominating her, check her out.

1. She already got it but you can have it again cause I am giving myself carte blanche. So, here's to Allie. (: I love a lot of the stuff she writes. Mostly she writes poems and they always either 1) touch my heart (cause I'm so like that) or 2) relate them to my own life.

2. The next award is for Alia. She writes things I love to read. She once wrote something along the lines of this: Life can be complicated but it can be simple. Truest story ever told (about life at least).

3. Next I pick Margaret from Finding Neverland. I love the title of her blog first and foremost, cause a lot of people spend so much time trying to stay young when growing up is just part of life. (I'm not even sure if that's what she meant by it but that's how I'm interpreting it.) But I chose her because she writes about the normal day to day things like family and freedom. Stuff I enjoy reading about.

4. Shelby love, one of my friendy friends from school is next. I chose her since her writing is straight up. She writes about whatevers going on in her life, she puts all her opinions in there and doesn't really hold back. She (well to me) is not really the kind of person to care about offending others to much. You may not like her opinions but she'll give um to you. Which is why I like her blog.

5. Rachel at Kiss the Rain because she writes about everything and anything she does or feels. She puts lots of quotes on her blog that sometimes I like to "borrow". Thank you. (;

And yeah, I know that's only 5 but if you were paying attention I don't like numbers like 6. It's so off. So blah if you don't like it, I could care less. lol.

It's always good to see life through someone else's eyes. That's what blogs do for me. And that's why each of these bloggers get this award. So once you get it make sure you pass it on.

Silly Rabbit,

learn how to steal the damn Trix already. Blah.

Anyways, I stayed up so late last night and was so tired today everyone told me I looked sick. :( Well, I did feel sick but put that to the side. I ended up sleeping right through my math class. GREAT. Now I gotta copy notes and homework before the next class! /: OH JOY.

I know i haven't posted much but this weekend shall be one for a cool post. I'm going to Maui High's Sophomore Banquet with Brandy. :D Yeah, I know I'm a senior at Kamehameha, my papa was confused as well. Don't be. Brandy just loves me and is taking me as her guest. So I bought a dress and new slippers last night. So cute.

Pictures soon!

Love yah lot's Bloggies.
Have a good Friday!! :D

Hold your Tongue.

Cause god knows whatever your about to say is probably pretty damn stupid!

Hah, Today I, what I'm sure Ekela will describe to half the world as "invaded" Drama kid territory, well their lunch table. And that in our school is enough to start a riot. It was incredibly dumb because of course Ekela is going to TRY and make me feel uncomfertable. Emphasis on try because I'm better then that and nothing he attempted to say or do even had any effect on me. NONE whatsoever. All his comments we're pretty dumb, and he did attempt many, many times. So I'll give him some props for the attempt and for persuing it even though I didn't care. The worst thing about it really was the fact that Ekela in all his attempts to make me uncomfertable and unhappy enough to leave the table actually got all sour and made himself have a shitty time.

So what does this teach you kids? I dunno actually, I was thinking something along the lines of even when somethings bothering you don't let it ruin your day or time or whatevers. (I gotta think that one through a little more. Help me out? lol.) Cause who knows, today might have been 10X better for him (and everyone else at the table who he thinks he has control of) if he'd dropped it and at least been civil. But then again, that's not his style. Whatevers though, High School 'drama b' like that is something I could care less about by now. Side note: About 38 days till graduation!!

And I'm sure a few of you are like "jdslfjsdifje, she's crazy, what if that boy reads this!" I kind of hope he does. I could really care less if he gets mad. We're such good friends still anyways. Ahahahahaha.

Anyways, have a good day all. (:

I need more sleep.

I'm tired but can't sleep.
Why does my body have to fight the one thing that keeps me sane?
Alive?
sdfljldsjflsd.
It's bullshit.
My body hates me. :(

Pro Procrastinator.

Seriously. lol. I have so much college stuff to take care of, important stuff, stuff I've been pushing off to the side. Like scholarships, housing, and student loans. OH to much work. Blah, blah. I'll get it all done on time. I always do.

But this post isn't really about my awesome procrastinating skills. It's more of a I-better-post-something-before-there's-a-riot post. Just kidding. But seriously. I haven't been posting much, even though I got more followers. (Shouldn't I be posting more?! Oh whatevers.)

Nothin' much has changed. Does it ever? NO. Well I did find out that I'm gonna go to Maui High's Sophomore Banquet with Brandy them. So that should be fun. Now I just have to go buy a dress. And that should be more fun, well if someone wants to give me money, if not, it'll be lame. Ahahaha. I'm so broke. I hate it. OH well, I gave up tons of hours I coulda worked and passed on. Damnit, I'm smart. I'll figure it out.l

And since I have nothing real special to talk about, except for that school is coming to a close in about two months (Which I'm extremely excited for!!) or that this weekend is Easter and I love Easter only for the candy and the egg sandwiches (And no, that's not a joke.) I found this picture for you to look at, laugh at, or whatever. Damn, that was one longgggg run on sentence. Ahahahha, no wonder I didn't take Mrs. Haina's class! I woulda failed that "Perfect Essay." x.x

Yummm, chocolate bunnies. (:

So if you're an Easter-er, Happy Easter and if not, just enjoy this long weekend. (: I know I will or I'll try at least. Shooties.

Load the Revolver.

Each mistake a bullet
And my gun's fully loaded
My mistakes holding me captive
I try to forget them, and put the past away
But glimpses from the past remind me of my flaws
Banding me like a scarlet letter pinned to my chest
Like scars on my soul, ones that are only visible to me
I relive the pain everyday and now I live for it
I live for the pain each day brings me, for I've accepted my fate
Pain has become my drug of life, taking it in hit after hit
For every one of my mistakes haunts me
And the harsh reality is the more I try and let go the tighter my grip gets
Each mistake a layer of myself, I try to peel away
But instead it feeds on me like prey
Tearing me apart with its vicious fangs
Each of my mistakes a wolf in the pack
Or a bullet in the gun
Either one ready to take me away
But I won't let them, I won't give up that easy
I'll face my mistakes head on and wipe my slate clean
'Cause when I wake up each morning I'll be renewed
Freed from the chains of my mistakes
Ready for the new beginning brought by the new day.

Parody, shmarody.

Parody to Drake's "Best I Ever Had" video, which sucked. Check it out on YouTube for yourself if you don't believe me but you mine as well take my word for it. Actually you should watch it cause the parody will make more sense, but anyways here it is for your enjoyment.



I pretty much spent half of my day watching YouTube vidoes. I need a life. Someone save me!!

The Silver Lining.

Is there one? Cause I don't fuckin' see it.

Many of the things I've learned in my short life:
- Grow up, and get over it.
- Don't run away from your problems, man up and face them!
- Don't protect those who don't deserve it.
- Don't let anyone force you (or force yourself) to grow up faster then you need to.
- Never go back to the bullshit that you probably left for a good reason in the first place. Or the people you left.
- The bad memories are the hardest to forget.
- Be stronger then those who THINK they can harm you; physically, mentally, however.
- If you want something done (or done right) do it YOURSELF!
- Don't trust anyone, because no one is trustworthy.
- Don't sell yourself short, you probably deserve better.
- If you're unhappy step up and do something about it.
- Never give your heart away unless you want it back in pieces.

FUCK liars!

So today was pretty good, then pretty shitty, then good, then shitty. I'm a big ball of fuckin' emotion today. So funny how I said I wouldn't be posting anything after this morning but I posted like 3 things today.