Oh Captain, my Captain.

Karpe Diem.
SERIOUSLY...I love that saying.

I've been working on a lot of stuff for college lately. I'm glad I've been a little productive even if I haven't been doing to much homework. I really can't wait till graduation though.

So I kind of fixed my computer, but I dunno. We'll see how long it lasts.

I wrote this in Creative Writing, it's called a Pantoum. It's called "Mistake" but that's just cause I wasn't feelin' to creative.

He made a mistake; he didn’t mean to hurt her.
He broke his own heart
What a terrible lesson to learn,
But that was just the start.

He broke his own heart
Tore it apart piece by piece
But that was just the start.
For he believed he was getting what he deserved.

Tore it apart piece by piece
He ripped his apology to shreds
For he believed he was getting what he deserved.
All good things must come to an end.

He ripped his apology to shreds
Instead he simply wrote a song.
All good things must come to an end
He said, although still clinging to belong.

Instead he simply wrote a song
What a terrible lesson to learn
He said, although still clinging to belong.
He made a mistake; he didn’t mean to hurt her.

If you figured it out pantoums repeat the same lines. Google it, it's a cool kind of poem to learn how to write, especially when it's something about a memory or the past. It kind of gives it this feeling that plays well with it. I'm not sure, maybe you feel it too.

So there is the post I promised last night. Be back soon. Shooties, bloggies. (;

Broken, broke-in.

My laptop has been broken lately and that's what I'll credit my lack of blog posts to. Also the intense amount of homework I've had that I of course waited till last minute to complete.

Blah, blah. Homework sucks, finals suck. We all know how that goes BUT seriously, only about 19 more days of school!! I'm stoked for school to end, not stoked for Project Grad but whatevers I'll live.

Well this is just about it for now, I think I'll have to put up another post later tonight for my lack of posting lately. So be lookin' out for it. Shooties for now.

So obviously

from my last post you see that I deserve the Nobel Peace Prize. Seriously, right?
Bah, whatevers. I had a bad day.

Today isn't anything special but this week feels crazy. I'm overwhelmed. To much stuff to do but to much of my best skills getting in my way. What are those you may ask?
1) Laziness
2) Superproprocrastination-ness (And that is totally a word!)
A shiz load of homework and projects and papers to be done and college stuff to prepare but so much NCIS to be watched and zzzzleeep to be had Seriously? How do my teachers expect me to do any of this while I have such a packed schedule of nothingness, I mean awesomeness.

Well I'm sure blogging isn't helping my busy situation either but there's always time for blogging. Wow, what a life I live. I can't wait to fail college. YAY me.

And I wish you all luck since you're surely in the same perdicament as me. And I'm out, night.

Go stick your head in the ground.

Seriously, I can't stand you. Don't bother me, EVER.

The end.

Act Like A Lady

Think Like A Man by Steve Harvey.It's a good book. You should check it out. Especially if you're not in a relationship yet and you're looking for one or you're in a new(ish) one. Actually I think anyone should read it but especially those people.

It talks a lot about relationships and guys secrets. Which you know any girl over the age of 15 wants to know. lol. But the 90 day rule and the 5 questions are two things I think that were the most useful things that I've read so far but I've only made it to Chapter 12.

Well go out and buy it or borrow it or whatevers.
Bye, bye Bloggies. Have a nice weekend.

I hate, hate, hate...

planning for college, and money.
They suck, suck, suck.

Yeah, I'm such a positive person I know.
Everyone hates me cause of it.

I'd like to thank the academy...

Actually I'd rather thank Safiaaa from Thinkers Reverie for giving me the Honest Scrap Award. :D


I stole this from her blog to describe it for you all:
The Honest Scrap Award is "for bloggers who put their heart on display as they write from the depths of their soul." You write 10 honest things about yourself that are not common knowledge and then you pass it on to 6 fellow bloggers that touch your heart by the honesty and sincerity they give with each post.

And lucky me got chosen. (; Safiaaa did say that I write about life in ways that she thinks anyone could relate to. I told this to le boyfriend and he says he agrees. So I'm guessing it must be true.

Speaking of true, one of the things required of me after receiving this award is to write 10 truthful things about myself that aren't common knowledge so here it goes.

1. I have issues with numbers. I hate odd numbers or numbers that aren't flat. By that I mean numbers that aren't 5, 10, 100 or stuff like that. I hate the numbers 27 and 56. My favorite number is 8.
2. I'm the messiest OCD person ever. Only certain things will "trigger" the OCD in me. Things like if my fingernails are different sizes, if my fingers aren't cracked, if the size of my writing changes on the same paper, if things aren't lined up nicely. And more.
3. I'm a mother bear. I'm nurturing when I see someone needs help but I don't like to be nurturing in my relationships with boys or close friendships.
4. I'm an off and on runner. Right now I'm off. I really like to run but it's to hard to do it up here where I live in Waihe'e. The air is so cold is burns my throat. :( I'll get it back though.
5. I'm almost anti-American food. I don't really eat much hamburgers, pizza or regular hot dogs. I do like "Hawaiian hot dogs" though, the red kine.
6. When I was little I was a vegetarian except for I would eat chicken nuggets. Which are still my favorite food till this day.
7. I like little kid stuff, like painting pictures, playing with play-doh and still watch some of the tv shows. I think this has a lot to do with babysitting so much.
8. My favorite candy is Resse's. I love chocolate. :D
9. I hate applying for scholarships and have been putting off filling out the papers and getting my recommendations for a LONG time.
10. I wanna be one of those parents that fills out that baby book almost religiously one day.

And lastly I need to nominate 6 (6? What a weird number) other bloggers to receive this award. I'm guessing that I can't give it back to the person who gave it to me which makes me sad since she would have been one of my 6. Oh I'll just have to work harder now. GREAT. (; Anyways, I would have nominated her since she writes about life really well in a way that I know many people can relate to. Her stuff is deep sometimes too. It's good so even though I'm not nominating her, check her out.

1. She already got it but you can have it again cause I am giving myself carte blanche. So, here's to Allie. (: I love a lot of the stuff she writes. Mostly she writes poems and they always either 1) touch my heart (cause I'm so like that) or 2) relate them to my own life.

2. The next award is for Alia. She writes things I love to read. She once wrote something along the lines of this: Life can be complicated but it can be simple. Truest story ever told (about life at least).

3. Next I pick Margaret from Finding Neverland. I love the title of her blog first and foremost, cause a lot of people spend so much time trying to stay young when growing up is just part of life. (I'm not even sure if that's what she meant by it but that's how I'm interpreting it.) But I chose her because she writes about the normal day to day things like family and freedom. Stuff I enjoy reading about.

4. Shelby love, one of my friendy friends from school is next. I chose her since her writing is straight up. She writes about whatevers going on in her life, she puts all her opinions in there and doesn't really hold back. She (well to me) is not really the kind of person to care about offending others to much. You may not like her opinions but she'll give um to you. Which is why I like her blog.

5. Rachel at Kiss the Rain because she writes about everything and anything she does or feels. She puts lots of quotes on her blog that sometimes I like to "borrow". Thank you. (;

And yeah, I know that's only 5 but if you were paying attention I don't like numbers like 6. It's so off. So blah if you don't like it, I could care less. lol.

It's always good to see life through someone else's eyes. That's what blogs do for me. And that's why each of these bloggers get this award. So once you get it make sure you pass it on.

Silly Rabbit,

learn how to steal the damn Trix already. Blah.

Anyways, I stayed up so late last night and was so tired today everyone told me I looked sick. :( Well, I did feel sick but put that to the side. I ended up sleeping right through my math class. GREAT. Now I gotta copy notes and homework before the next class! /: OH JOY.

I know i haven't posted much but this weekend shall be one for a cool post. I'm going to Maui High's Sophomore Banquet with Brandy. :D Yeah, I know I'm a senior at Kamehameha, my papa was confused as well. Don't be. Brandy just loves me and is taking me as her guest. So I bought a dress and new slippers last night. So cute.

Pictures soon!

Love yah lot's Bloggies.
Have a good Friday!! :D

Hold your Tongue.

Cause god knows whatever your about to say is probably pretty damn stupid!

Hah, Today I, what I'm sure Ekela will describe to half the world as "invaded" Drama kid territory, well their lunch table. And that in our school is enough to start a riot. It was incredibly dumb because of course Ekela is going to TRY and make me feel uncomfertable. Emphasis on try because I'm better then that and nothing he attempted to say or do even had any effect on me. NONE whatsoever. All his comments we're pretty dumb, and he did attempt many, many times. So I'll give him some props for the attempt and for persuing it even though I didn't care. The worst thing about it really was the fact that Ekela in all his attempts to make me uncomfertable and unhappy enough to leave the table actually got all sour and made himself have a shitty time.

So what does this teach you kids? I dunno actually, I was thinking something along the lines of even when somethings bothering you don't let it ruin your day or time or whatevers. (I gotta think that one through a little more. Help me out? lol.) Cause who knows, today might have been 10X better for him (and everyone else at the table who he thinks he has control of) if he'd dropped it and at least been civil. But then again, that's not his style. Whatevers though, High School 'drama b' like that is something I could care less about by now. Side note: About 38 days till graduation!!

And I'm sure a few of you are like "jdslfjsdifje, she's crazy, what if that boy reads this!" I kind of hope he does. I could really care less if he gets mad. We're such good friends still anyways. Ahahahahaha.

Anyways, have a good day all. (:

I need more sleep.

I'm tired but can't sleep.
Why does my body have to fight the one thing that keeps me sane?
Alive?
sdfljldsjflsd.
It's bullshit.
My body hates me. :(

Pro Procrastinator.

Seriously. lol. I have so much college stuff to take care of, important stuff, stuff I've been pushing off to the side. Like scholarships, housing, and student loans. OH to much work. Blah, blah. I'll get it all done on time. I always do.

But this post isn't really about my awesome procrastinating skills. It's more of a I-better-post-something-before-there's-a-riot post. Just kidding. But seriously. I haven't been posting much, even though I got more followers. (Shouldn't I be posting more?! Oh whatevers.)

Nothin' much has changed. Does it ever? NO. Well I did find out that I'm gonna go to Maui High's Sophomore Banquet with Brandy them. So that should be fun. Now I just have to go buy a dress. And that should be more fun, well if someone wants to give me money, if not, it'll be lame. Ahahaha. I'm so broke. I hate it. OH well, I gave up tons of hours I coulda worked and passed on. Damnit, I'm smart. I'll figure it out.l

And since I have nothing real special to talk about, except for that school is coming to a close in about two months (Which I'm extremely excited for!!) or that this weekend is Easter and I love Easter only for the candy and the egg sandwiches (And no, that's not a joke.) I found this picture for you to look at, laugh at, or whatever. Damn, that was one longgggg run on sentence. Ahahahha, no wonder I didn't take Mrs. Haina's class! I woulda failed that "Perfect Essay." x.x

Yummm, chocolate bunnies. (:

So if you're an Easter-er, Happy Easter and if not, just enjoy this long weekend. (: I know I will or I'll try at least. Shooties.

Load the Revolver.

Each mistake a bullet
And my gun's fully loaded
My mistakes holding me captive
I try to forget them, and put the past away
But glimpses from the past remind me of my flaws
Banding me like a scarlet letter pinned to my chest
Like scars on my soul, ones that are only visible to me
I relive the pain everyday and now I live for it
I live for the pain each day brings me, for I've accepted my fate
Pain has become my drug of life, taking it in hit after hit
For every one of my mistakes haunts me
And the harsh reality is the more I try and let go the tighter my grip gets
Each mistake a layer of myself, I try to peel away
But instead it feeds on me like prey
Tearing me apart with its vicious fangs
Each of my mistakes a wolf in the pack
Or a bullet in the gun
Either one ready to take me away
But I won't let them, I won't give up that easy
I'll face my mistakes head on and wipe my slate clean
'Cause when I wake up each morning I'll be renewed
Freed from the chains of my mistakes
Ready for the new beginning brought by the new day.

Parody, shmarody.

Parody to Drake's "Best I Ever Had" video, which sucked. Check it out on YouTube for yourself if you don't believe me but you mine as well take my word for it. Actually you should watch it cause the parody will make more sense, but anyways here it is for your enjoyment.



I pretty much spent half of my day watching YouTube vidoes. I need a life. Someone save me!!

The Silver Lining.

Is there one? Cause I don't fuckin' see it.

Many of the things I've learned in my short life:
- Grow up, and get over it.
- Don't run away from your problems, man up and face them!
- Don't protect those who don't deserve it.
- Don't let anyone force you (or force yourself) to grow up faster then you need to.
- Never go back to the bullshit that you probably left for a good reason in the first place. Or the people you left.
- The bad memories are the hardest to forget.
- Be stronger then those who THINK they can harm you; physically, mentally, however.
- If you want something done (or done right) do it YOURSELF!
- Don't trust anyone, because no one is trustworthy.
- Don't sell yourself short, you probably deserve better.
- If you're unhappy step up and do something about it.
- Never give your heart away unless you want it back in pieces.

FUCK liars!

So today was pretty good, then pretty shitty, then good, then shitty. I'm a big ball of fuckin' emotion today. So funny how I said I wouldn't be posting anything after this morning but I posted like 3 things today.

Without you, temporarily. *Updated!!

I lied, I am posting something else today. This song that I found thanks to Safiaaaaa at Thinkers Reverie.



"Every night I remember that event the way you looked when you said you were leaving... And I'm a little bit lost without you, and I'm a bloody big mess inside, and I'm a little bit lost without you."

He left on a plane to Florida this morning. We said our goodbyes last night. He doesn't know when he'll be back but it'll be a while. I already miss you and you haven't even been gone 24 hours. :(

But yay for best friends and cheer up seshs that really don't include doing much but chillin' at the house. Still, she's awesome.

And this song because Britt. Who is not only my best friend but a blog writer at this place. (:

FL is a happiness theif.

He's leaving on a plane right now. I'm sad.
That's all I'll be posting today.

"When she walks outside she brightens up the day. Oh boy she don't play around. She took me all the way." - B.D.

Promises, promises.

So, here is that picture I promised you. Which is surprising since I have problems with keeping promises.

Nothin' special, it was just a picture in the car on our way back home. I wasn't smiling and I realize what a junk picture this is now. So I'll counteract it with this one...

Left to right : Brittney, me, Brandy and Richelle

This ones from one night during Spring Break. A interesting night that no one probably expected to go so well.

Hashhhhh.

Alright, so like I said in my last post two days ago, I'm sorry for the lack of regularity in my posting. I'll get back on track.

Today I spent the day with the people I love most in this world, the Badayos' 'Ohana and my boyfriend. (: They make me very happy and I enjoyed my day. We went to the beach and just enjoyed ourselves. I didn't do much suntanning because I'm already pretty burnt and starting to peel. I'll post the one picture I took later because I'm on my phone right now and can't pix message it while I'm on a phone call. Damn, I need an iPhone. lol. We pretty much spent the whole day talking about crazy things that you only talk about with Brittney (well pretty much) and eating lots and lots of good food. Cause Aunty Cyn isn't gonna let you be anywhere near anorexic near her. lol. Uncle Gil went picking Ogo and gave me lots to take home to my uncle, we'll see what he makes of it tomorrow.

I have a bad habit of using crappy transitions like "anyways" or "moving on," I need to work on that.

It's pretty late on Sunday night right now, almost Monday morning. That doesn't leave much time till my boyfriend leaves on a three month vacation. :( :( :( Im'ma miss that kid, lots. "Ur really the only logical choice." Oh how I hate that txt speak he uses, I try not to use it. Although I do use certain vernacular in my txt messaging, but it's just to get my feelings across correctly. It's really easy to misinterpret things in a txt message and using certain vernacular helps solve that problem a little bit. I much prefer a phone call but I also prefer to keep my bill low, so with unlimited txting sometimes it's better to just txt.

But I'm totally going off topic, I brought up his txt because he told me I was a logical choice for him. I frown at his choice of words. I don't believe love is very logical, actually I believe logic really doesn't have much to do with love. Enough talk of love and logic though. I really just wanna talk about how long 3 months sounds and how sad I'll be to not have him around all the time even if he does irritate me sometimes and infuriate me at others. Most times we do get along well.

Sad, sad, sad. I don't want to be sad. I'm actually pretty excited for his trip. Hope you come back clear headed and ready for the future deary. Speaking of the future, I'm very, very excited for mine. In about two months I will be a high school graduate of the class of 2010 and two months after that I'll be an entering freshmen at UH Manoa. What could be more exciting then moving to a new island and becoming a little more independent. NOTHING I say. Or nothing I've experienced quite yet, I've got lot's of living to do though.

Oh, an update from my other post, I did end up trying a Dark Cherry Mocha Frap at Starbucks with Brittney. I actually really, really liked it and I feel like a fatty for reviewing a Starbucks drink that's probably like three meals worth in calories but oh well.

It's getting late, my laptop is going to die soon so this is the end. Have a great Monday everyone doing whatever it is you do on Mondays. As for me, I'm still on Spring Break and I'll still be waking up early to go to "work" and then to my grandma's house. Oh what a joy. Hopefully I'll see my fave boy tomorrow before he gets ready for his little odyssey. And hopefully this sunburnpeelingness goes away very, very quickly.

P.S. Yay, I now have 11 followers. (: (: (:

Yes, I know.

I've been slacking majorly in the bloggin' and I've really can't say I'm all that busy. I just don't have much to write about these days. So hopefully this isn't super duper lame.

I've gone to the beach for three days in a row, it is soooo nice. Everyday is a sweeter day then the one before. Except for the sunburn, that's horrendous. I've been spending A LOT (like all of those three days) with my boyfriend at the beach since he'll be leaving for Florida on Tuesday for a two month long trip. :( :( :( It kinda sucks but it's kinda good. Moving on though because thinking about it makes me sadish.

I've been kinda baby sitting my cousin all week (Spring Break dontcha' know?). It's kind of sucked. She's irritating, slightly and she won't let me have 5 seconds to myself. Ahhhh, I just about killed the child when she misbehaved all day then made me buy her shave ice. Whatevers though, like you wanna read all this complaining.

LOCAL BOYS SHAVE ICE!! (: Yummmm. Yesterday I got some, all red raspberry with Kauai cream. Yum, yum, yum, yum!! I love Local Boys. lol. If you ever come to Maui (for those of you who don't live here) you've gotta try it. You'll love it. I'm gonna miss it when I go to O'ahu this summer.

Oh summer. I'm kind of excited in a scared way for that. It's getting so close which means graduation is getting so close, which means college is getting so close. Oh I could go on forever. lol. But I'll stop there. I've got a lot of planning to do still. I haven't done much. Only sent in my intent to register with my check. I haven't filled out any other finicial aid or housing or anything. I'm majorily falling behind and it'll cause so much stress in the near future. WHATEVER though, I need to enjoy myself for a little while. I've been way to strung out for way to long.

Hope this was worth reading, I'll be back soon. I promise.

Excuses, excuses.

I know you don't wanna hear them buuuuuuuuuuut here it is. I did not go through with my promise post of whatever I got because I'm lazy, I won't even lie. That's the only reason. We'll pretty much.

Moving on.

This weekend was a doosy and I won't even go in to it but if I did it'd probably be the best Anti-Teenage-Drinking (maybe, even anti-drinking period) ad ever created. EVER. The rest of the BBQ (before I became covered in puke, yes, I did say puke) was pretty sweet. Shebs mom made awesome food and we all were just enjoying ourselves. I hope we got some good pictures from that night, I'll be looking forward to seeing those. (P.S. Thanks Shelb!! Have fun in Cali!)

Today I took my lil cuz down to Tutti Frutti to go get some Fro-Yo. It was yummy of course but it was slightly ruined by the rude man that walked in with his son not to much later. I hate people who are rude in public especially around young children. Do you really think that your child won't immitate you? REALLY? You idiot. I could raise a child a bit better then you and I'm 17. I'm so irritated with rude people. Pet peeve much.

On a happier note I'm excited to go to the beach tomorrow. I love Kihei, I love the beach and (sometimes) I love the sun. (: So all that love = excitement. Maybe I'll even take pictures, because my blogs been lackin in the photography department.

Two more things and I'm out. 1. Starbucks has a new drink: Dark Cherry Mocha. I was gonna try it today but I'm one of those people that eat,drink,buy,w/e the same things over and over and over again till I about puke so I stuck with the Iced Chai but I'd like to try this. The barista said it was good, but I'm still unsure. Let me know if you try it!! (: And 2. You can still send requests (or comment them) because I want more. lol. Thanks!



So Spring Break is starting out pretty well if I do say so myself. I hope you're all enjoying yourselves as well!! (: